


An Angel’s Guide to Love

by SineadNovak394



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 15x18 was a trip, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, I neeeded the happiness, M/M, No Plot, SPOILERS BTW, Season 15, Short Story, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, i wrote this instead of crying, just fluff, lots of gay, oh the pain, very gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:46:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27445096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SineadNovak394/pseuds/SineadNovak394
Summary: A Destiel short story. Post Despair, season 15 episode 18. Spoilers. Everyone in 15x18 is alive except for Cas.It's been a year and a half since God, more commonly referred to as Chuck,  was defeated. Sam and Eileen are easily navigating their way through a relationship. Jack is working hard with Adam and Michael to keep Heaven, Earth and Hell all in order.And then there's Dean.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Kaia Nieves/Claire Novak
Comments: 13
Kudos: 183





	1. Someone You Loved

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILERS LIKE TURN BACK IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN 15X18 DESPAIR OF SUPERNATURAL

[Song that goes with chapter ](https://youtu.be/u1yVCeXYya4)

  
And then it was done. 

Jack had killed God. Billie was trapped in the Empty. The Empty itself was back asleep. Everything was over. Lucifer has been resurrected so Jack could use his father's power to substitute for Jack's lost powers. But Lucifer was back in his cage and powerless.

But it felt like there was something missing. Or rather someone. 

Sam has Eileen. Michael has Adam. Jack is currently thinking that he may be an ace/aro, but he has Heaven to run so he's too busy to be in a relationship just yet. Jody, Donna and the girls are busy hunting. Garth continues to let his family grow. Rowena happily rules Hell. 

But Dean... Dean just doesn't fit in anymore. 

The Winchester was changed when his best friend was taken from him. When his best friend chose to leave him behind. Dean constantly had to remind himself that Castiel was gone for good. His friend, his lover, was never coming back. 

That was another thing. Dean never got to tell Cas that he loved him back. The only person- or rather angel- that ever made Dean feel completely human, died thinking that Dean didn't love him back. That was probably the most painful thing of all. 

The Empty had taken Cas for good. Dean was never going to see his fallen angel ever again. 

**January 24, 2021**

It was early July 2019, that Castiel died. Dean barely contacted anyone anymore. It had been a year and a half since Cas was taken. He spent his time alone in the Bunker. Sam had moved out with Eileen a few months back. When Dean wasn't in the Bunker, he was out on quick hunts. That was how he got all his anger out, hunts. 

The Bunker seemed quiet. Dean sat in the map room with a drink in his hand. His chin rested in his free hand and he was half asleep. Dean jolted up when he heard the Bunker's door open. He almost spilled his beer over his flannel as he looked to see who it was. 

Who is bothering him and why are they here? 

There were footsteps. Dean took out an angel blade, ready to attack whoever came through that doorway. 

"Dean? Dean, you still alive in here?" A voice calls. 

The hunter instantly put down his angel blade as he recognized the voice. "Sammy, I'm in here," he calls to his younger brother. 

Sam comes through the doorway with Eileen close to his side. Jody followed in behind them. Dean looks at the three of them, confused as to why the hell they are here. Not that he minds them visiting, it's just they usually have a reason to stop by. 

"What's the special occasion?" Dean asks, taking a sip of his beer. 

The trio looks at him like he is forgetting something really important. Because today was really important. Jody turns to the couple, "is he joking with us or does he really not know what today is?" The sheriff asks. 

"What's today? National burger day or something. Because if it is, I can still make a few burgers." Dean really has no idea what the importance of today is. 

The younger Winchester sighs. He reaches into his coat and takes out a gift wrapped item. He hands it to his older brother, "happy birthday, Dean." 

"It's the twenty-fourth? Already?" Dean asked, taking the gift and looking at his brother with a confused look. 

"Yes, it is. Open the present." 

"Sam- you didn't have to get me a present," the elder Winchester looks at Sam with a serious facial expression. 

Sam had the same serious look on his face. "I know, Dean. You say that each year. Just open the damn gift." 

There's a moment of stillness before Dean finally gives in and opens the wrapped present. Dean unwraps the item. He freezes when he sees what it is. It's a framed picture of Team Free Will 2.0 and it was a picture that Dean didn't have. The picture was from a few years back. If Dean remembers correctly it was just after Michael had unpossessed him. It had been Castiel's idea since they didn't really have an updated picture of the four of them. Dean though that picture had gotten lost forever, but apparently not. 

Dean looks down at the picture for a few moments, completely silent. He moves his hand and gently traces the outline of Cas. He looks back up at Sam, Eileen and Jody. Jody had that look on her face. The look of a mother who knew her son had lost the love of his life. 

"Thank you," Dean thanks quietly, adding the sign for 'thank you' to Eileen. 

"Happy birthday, Dean," Eileen says. 

Jody hugs Dean and Sam pats his shoulder. Jody claps once, "now! Should I get the cake?" 

As the sheriff goes to get the cake she brought, Dean looks back at the picture. His eyes linger on Castiel's figure. Dean shakes his head sadly and puts the picture down. Oh, how much he misses Cas.

The cake is brought in and the four go to the kitchen to eat it. Jody has also brought a candle to have an official birthday party. 

Dean, Sam and Eileen all sit down at the table while Jody gets out one of the knifes to cut the cake. Before Jody cuts the cake, however, the cake is placed in front of Dean with the candle burning in the center of it. Dean blew out the candle after everyone wished him a happy birthday again. 

Despite it being a childish thing, Dean made a wish when he blew out the fire. He wanted his Castiel back, Dean would do whatever it takes to get Cas back. Yet there wasn't anything to do to get him back, because Dean can't. He can't get him back. 

Jody cut into the small cake and gave each of the three a piece also getting one for herself. Everyone dug into the cake. The cake has a simple chocolate flavor and the frosting is plain white. It wasn't much, but when hunters ever get what they deserve? 

It didn't take long for the cake to disappear. After it is gone, Sam, Eileen and Jody stick around for a bit and hang out with Dean. 

The entire time, the trio notices how Dean is different from before Chuck was defeated, before Cas died. They could tell how hurt Dean is. And there is nothing they could do to make it better. 

After a few drinks, the three visitors left. And then Dean was alone. Again. 

Or at least, that's what he thought. 

Dean realizes he isn't yet alone when he senses a presence behind him. Dean turns, once again taking out his angel blade in self defense. Sam, Eileen and Jody had just left, so who is bothering him now? Can't they just leave Dean alone? 

He lowers the blade when he sees Jack standing in the corner. Jack looks so much more mature now that rules Earth from the shadows. Jack looks over Earth, Adam and Michael rule Heaven and Rowena rules Hell, it was as simple as that. Jack had changed, everyone had, but Jack was still the Winchesters' boy. 

"Hello, Dean," Jack greets. 

Jack's just like Cas, Dean notes. "Hey, Jack. You missed the cake," Dean says, informing the Nephilim that he had missed everyone. 

"I know." Jack pauses. "I just wanted to give you my gift after you were visited by everyone else." 

Dean shakes his head, "I appreciate the thought, but I'm really not in the mood to accept gifts right now." 

The Winchester starts to turn his back and walk away from Jack. However, Jack uses his wings and quickly reappears in front of Dean to stop him from walking away. "I think you'll like this gift," Jack says. 

And then there's another voice from behind them. A voice Dean thought he would never hear again. 

"Hello Dean." 


	2. Take Me Back

[Song w/ chapter ](https://youtu.be/MCZnMDZrgvQ)

Dean whips around. He had to check that he isn't just hearing things. "Cas?" Dean asks quietly, looking at the man now in front of him. 

The fallen angel steps towards his hunter, "it's really me." 

Dean turns to Jack, "what- how? How did you-?" 

Jack smiles at Dean. "Lucifer. We broke Lucifer out of the Empty so I could get my powers back. But the Empty wanted Lucifer back so his collection of archangels could be complete. The Empty has Apocalypse Michael. So I sort of made a trade. Castiel for Lucifer. And The Empty said yes."

The Nephilim looks at the two men. "I'll leave you two alone..." he says, sneaking out of the room to let them be. 

Dean looks back at Cas. 

The fallen angel walks over to his hunter. Silently, Cas looks Dean over his head tilting slightly as he does. Cas saw what everyone else saw. That Dean was broken. But Cas could do something no one else could. He could fix Dean, fix the hole in his heart. Castiel looks at Dean for a few moments longer before doing what Dean usually does and pulling the hunter into a hug.

Dean immediately hugs him back. They stay there for a bit, just enjoying being back together. 

"I'm sorry, Dean," Cas says.

The hunter pulls away and looks at Castiel. "It's okay, Cas. I'm just glad you're back." 

"I am too." 

There's no mention of what Castiel said before he let the Empty take him. That just isn't a topic that the two want to discuss just yet. 

Cas looks around. "How long has it been?" 

The hunter shakes his head. "Far too long. It's been a year and a half. Sam moved out a few months ago to be with Eileen. He's considering asking her to marry him. Jack's usually up to the tips of his wings in work. It's just me here most of the time." 

"A year and a half... I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing. It's what any of us would do," Dean assures him. If Dean had only been able to do the same for Cas, this reunion would have happened a lot sooner. "Besides, I should be sorry. I let you rot in that place for so long." 

"No, you don't need to be sorry, Dean. You couldn't do anything, Dean. The Empty made it so I could almost never see the light of day again. It was luck that Jack managed to make that deal of me for Lucifer," Cas says. 

Soon enough, the pair sits down and Dean catches Cas up on everything he missed. Dean told Cas everything from how Jack defeated God to every hunt Dean went on. Cas listened the entire time, a content look on the angel's face. Castiel was back. Whether Dean loved him in return or not, he was back with his best friend. Cas was back with the human who made him stronger than he ever was, even if Cas is no longer a full-powered angel. 

Before long, Jack comes back into the room. He joins the two of them, not bringing much attention to himself. 

"You aren't going to take him back, are you?" Dean asks suddenly, looking over to Jack. 

"No," Jack answers, "Cas is staying here. He's staying with us." 

About an hour later, Jack leaves to go back to Heaven. This leaves just Castiel and Dean to themselves again. When Jack leaves, Dean makes a burger for himself for dinner. Cas just watches him cook silently. When he finishes up cooking, he gets another beer for himself and one for Cas. 

When Dean sits back down at the table across from the angel, he asks a question. "What was it like- in the Empty? You weren't awake for most of it, were you?" 

Cas had been waiting for that question to pop up. The angel shuffles in his chair a bit. "Angels and demons, when they are sent to the Empty, they are forever forced to dream about their regrets." 

The hunter nods, silently asking him to go on. 

"On repeat, I dreamt of all the times I failed you, all the times I betrayed you." 

_You're dead to me_

_Cas what the hell?_

_I was there, where were you?_

_I feel regret about what I did to you and Sam_ _\- yeah, well you should_

_Maybe if you didn't just up and leave us_

Cas has a sad look on his face. He betrayed Dean so many times. But each time, Dean would allow him to come back, to come home. Even if it did take Dean a couple years to forgive him, Cas always got to return. 

"Cas?" 

"Yes, Dean?" 

The Winchester hesitates before going on, "before you let yourself... before the Empty took you, what you said... was that true?" 

Castiel looks right at Dean. "Every word. I have _loved_ you since the day I first met you. You taught me to love the world, to love humanity. Maybe you made me more human than any angel before The Fall, but you made me stronger too. Dean, you helped me to be better. And I-I know you don't feel the same; but just know that even if you don't love yourself, there is someone who does." 

There's silence in the room after Cas finishes up speaking. Dean doesn't know how to respond to that. 

The fallen angel looks at Dean's face. "Should I go? I should go-" He moves to leave but Dean stops him by grabbing on to the trench-coat sleeve. Dean pulls Cas closer to him and connects their lips. The hunter kisses Cas for a few seconds before pulling away and muttering, "I love you too," against the angel's lips. 


	3. A Thousand Years

[Song w/ chapter ](https://youtu.be/-Ey9N745xLU)

**  
April 23, 2021**

It has now been a few months since Castiel had gotten back from the Empty. Cas was getting back into a routine that he had going with Dean. Some days they would go on hunts together, other days they would visit their friends. Then the rest of the days that they had off, they would spend together bonding. 

The pair had visited Garth and his family a couple time. Garth had begun to tell his kids to call the, 'Uncle Dean' and 'Uncle Cas'. They also visited the Wayward Sisters a few times. Claire and Kaia are kicking it off in a relationship together and that is going well so far. Sam and Eileen still hunt together and are getting close. In fact, the week before, Sam had asked Eileen to marry him, she said yes! That was very exciting news. 

When Cas decides it is time to leave his room in the late hours of the morning, the Angel is surprised to not see Dean already up. Confused as to why Dean isn't up and present, he goes to check and see if he is in his bedroom. Dean isn't in his bedroom either. 

That's when Castiel begins to worry. He searches the entire bunker for his lover, but Dean is no where to be found. Finally, Cas goes back out to the map room to where Cas had left his phone. He could just call and ask Dean where he is. Opening up his phone to call Dean, Cas spots a note pinned to the wall across from him. 

Curious, Cas walks over to the note and takes it down. He reads through the note after seeing that its Dean's handwriting.

_'Cas-_

_Go back to the place we met_

_(In person, not Hell)_

_\- Dean'_

Cas instantly remembers the barn he had first met Dean in. He remembers the moment perfectly. The way he had been so different back then. Such a loyal little angel, he was. Now look how far he's fallen. 

It takes Cas a few hours to get to the barn. The sigils and wardings are still on the walls of the barn. The markings are all faded but evidence of them originally being there is present. 

The Angel gets confused when he sees Dean once again not there. Where is Dean? What is he playing at? 

After some more looking around, there is another note in the corner of the barn. The Angel goes over to it and picks it up, reading it. 

_'Hey Cas,_

_Looks like you found the first place. Maybe you haven't figure it out already, but I'm setting you on a scavenger hunt! And don't worry, it'll be worth it._

_... I hope._

_Anyway, go to the place we went on our first "last night on Earth"_

_\- Dean'_

Cas has to think a bit on this one. When was there first last night on Earth? And then he remembers it. The strip bar! Dean had tried so hard to get Cas laid, only if he had known that Cas only wanted Dean and no one else. 

The journey to the strip bar was a bit less of a ride. He got there in about an hour and a half. 

The strip bar is still there and it looked the same as it did when he and Dean visited it all those years ago. 

Isn't this a good trip down memory lane? 

Not exactly knowing what to do next, Cas took to looking around inside the strip club. A few women tried to get his attention, but he ignored each and every one of them. Eventually a male worker who looked like he made the drinks came up to Cas. 

"Excuse me, are you Castiel?" 

Cas looks down at the man. This guy was shorter than him. "Yes, I am," the angel responds. 

The man gives Cas a small slip of paper. Another note. "This is for you, some dude came up to me earlier telling me to give it to you if you came by." 

Castiel thanks the man and reads the note. 

_'Congrats! You found the place where I first felt truly happy._

_Now, do you think you can remember the place where you first looked happy?_

_Hint: it's outside_

_\- Dean_

This one took a lot of thinking. Finally, Cas remembers the first time he smiled around Dean. The two of them had been sitting at a playground. And Cas is lucky enough to remember exactly where that playground is located. 

The journey to the playground took about three and a half hours to get there. When he arrives, Cas took a good look around. He wonders where in the name of his dead father, could Dean hide another note. 

And yet, Cas was soon handed a note by a mother who was being begged by a young kid to go home. It seems the mother had been forced to wait there until Castiel got the note before she could leave with her kid. 

The mother angrily hands Castiel the note and is on her way to leave in seconds. 

Cas looks down at the note and reads it, 

_'You're almost done!_

_Only a few more places to go. Next up, I want you to remember the place where you first learned of how great Jack was going to be._

_Good luck!_

_\- Dean'_

Cas knows exactly where Dean is talking about right away. The memory is still fresh in his mind of the time that he had first felt the power of Jack. That was the moment Castiel realized that Jack really was going to be great. And Jack is great. Hell, Jack saved the world! 

A wave of sadness washes over Cas as he realizes that he wasn't there to see Jack's big win. He wasn't there to support his son. 

Pushing past the emotion, Castiel made his way to the Entrance of Heaven. 

The way to Heaven's Gates was a bit more of a drive. A solid four hours Cas spent in the car. The Angel hopes that this really will be worth it, like Dean says. The day is almost over by now. But Cas kept going. Dean said that he is getting close to finishing up whatever kind of scavenger's hunt this is. 

Eventually, Cas arrives at the Gates of Heaven. Right in front of the entrance, is a note being held down from the wind by a rock. Cas walks over and picks the note up, placing the rock off to the side. 

_'One more stop and then this is done._

_The last location you need to go to, you know like the back of your vessel's hand._

_Come home, Cas._

_\- Dean'_

Cas put the note into his pocket. He turns his back on the Gates of Heaven and walks back over to his car. He gets in and drives back to his home. Back to the Bunker. And hopefully back to Dean. 

The sun is set by the time Cas arrives back at the Bunker. He parks his car in the garage and enters the Bunker. 

The Bunker seems quiet. Cas hopes that he got the right last place of the scavenger hunt. If he did not, that is probably a bad thing. The Angel looks around, trying to see if there is a final note hidden somewhere that he didn't see before. 

When Cas reaches the bedroom hallway of the bunker, he sees multiple red rose petals on the ground, leading away down the end of the hall. 

Curious as to where the trail of petals leads, Cas follows the red colored petals carefully. 

The petals lead to room 7B, which was opened. The petals led to the bookshelf. Knowing that there is something behind the bookshelf, Castiel cautiously pushes the bookshelf out of the way. 

Cas is relieved to actually see Dean in the room and not some random demon who is trying to kidnap him or something. Dean has his arms behind his back, like he is hiding something. 

The angel walks in the room, looking a confused as to what exactly Dean is doing. "Dean? What is this?" He asks. 

"Cas... we've known each other for thirteen years. That's a long time. Before we met, I didn't even believe that angels were real. Because if they were, how could they let everything that happens in the world happen? But then I met you. Everything changed. This is pretty chick-flicky but you have made me so much better as a human. And I never thought that I would want to marry someone because of this hunting life, I never thought that I would get a chance to do that. But I do now. And I want to, Cas I really want to." Dean looks at Castiel. Slowly, he brings out a small box and sinks to one knee. "Castiel, will you marry me?" 

Castiel looks surprised. His facial expression is blank for a moment, before a smile forms on his lips. "Yes, I will." 

**September 18, 2021**

"Are you ready?" 

"I don't know honestly. Are _you_ ready?" 

"I don't know either!" 

This is a day neither Winchester thought would happen. For starters, neither thought they would be getting married at all. They didn't think they would live that long. For another thing, they are getting married on the same day! 

After Dean and Cas gave the news to Sam and Eileen, the four of them came up with the idea to get married on the same day. 

Sam and Dean are getting ready in the same dressing room together, while Eileen and Cas have their own dressing rooms. 

"This is the big day, Sammy, can you believe that?" Dean asks his brother. 

Sam shakes his head. "I can't believe it." 

"And you're sure you don't want your hair up. I bet I can find some hair pins-"

"Dean, no." 

The elder brother chuckles as he finishes up straightening his tie. He goes on to help his brother neaten up. "You look great, Sam. You and Eileen are going to be so happy together." 

Sammy smiles at that. "And you and Cas will be an amazing official couple." 

Sam sees his brother's face fall slightly in the mirror. "What is it?" 

"Since today is a huge chick flick day, might as well just go with it... I'm scared, Sam. I've lost Cas so many times already. I don't want to loose him again," Dean says. 

"You won't. Maybe something will come up in the far future and Cas is taken from us, but you will never truly loose him. He loves you, he loves you so much. And you love him, don't you? That love can never be forgotten or lost. Never." 

Dean and Sam finish up getting ready. And before long, it's go time. Both Winchester brothers go out before their lovers. The two brothers stand side by side, waiting nervously for their partners to come down the aisle. 

Cas and Eileen walk arm in arm down the aisle. Since neither of them have their parents present, they decided to go together. 

Eileen smiles shyly up at Sam. She looks absolutely stunning in her white, long wedding dress. Happiness sparkles in her eyes as she walks up to her future husband. 

Castiel looks just as good. His trench-coat is absent and he's in a really nice suit that has a blue and white flower pinned to it. His hair is a bit nearer than usual and he's looking at Dean with the same happiness that he had when he confessed. 

The marriage officiant goes through the blessings and all the wedding vows before finally turning to Eileen. "Do you, Eileen Leahy, take Samuel William Winchester to be your lawfully wedded husband?" 

"I do." 

"And do you, Samuel William Winchester, take Eileen Leahy to be your lawfully wedded wife?" 

"I do." 

The officiant turns to Dean and Cas. "Do you, Dean Michael Winchester, take Castiel Novak to be your lawfully wedded husband?" 

"Hell yeah, I do." 

"And do you, Castiel Novak, take Dean Michael Winchester to be your lawfully wedded husband?" 

"Yes, I do." 

"Then," the officiant says, "you may kiss the bride and you may kiss the groom." 


	4. Afterword

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not a chapter 
> 
> Just some thanks from the author

[A final song ](https://youtu.be/2X_2IdybTV0)

  
So... it is currently Saturday, November 7th, 2020. Despair, 15x18, came out three days ago. And when I tell you I sobbed when *it* happened, I mean I SOBBED violently. 

And to grieve, I decided to write the ending I want. Of course, the last two episodes are currently yet to air and Chuck knows that I won't be expecting whatever comes and if Cas comes back or not (Misha is rumored to have gone to Vancouver to film something sometime in the last two episodes- so here's hoping). 

But I just want to say thank you to everything and everyone.

First, thank you for reading this. I really hoped you enjoyed it, no matter how short it is. 

Secondly, I want to thank everyone who helped to create Supernatural. In particular, Misha Collins. Like so many others, Castiel has been my favorite character. He's a comfort character and just a wonderfully created part of the story. Misha did an absolute incredible job as Cas and I'm so glad I got to see his performance as this character. Thank you everyone who created SPN and thank you Misha. 

Love you all <3

\- Sinéad 


End file.
